This last week, I’ve been working on pulling together my initial insights and questions for the resource center… what I was thinking and observing in the beginning, that got the ball rolling in my brain. These are some of the initial insights that have fueled my desire in creating this vision.
It had occurred to me a number of years ago, as I had gone through some personal adversity, that people don’t automatically “know” all the answers (or even just some of the answers)… or what in the world the next steps are to take. I certainly didn’t know the answers. People don’t know where to look to find the answers they need… and many times don’t know who to talk to. We, as people, need tangible tools to be proactive… to make healthy and responsible decisions. But, we need a little hands-on help in getting there… we also need a little connection with people who want to be on board to help us.
It also occurred to me that we are people who are taught to be strong individuals. To do it on our own. When we fall… we need to pull up our boot-staps and go again. But, how do you go again (or go the first time) if you don’t know what you’re doing?
Then there’s asking for help… that’s an obstacle unto itself. Some of us are better at it than others. Asking for help isn’t easy. If we want to ask for help, does that mean we’re weak? Where does this notion come from?
We are a people who struggle… to communicate our needs to each other. More than that, we just struggle to communicate in general to each other. Our culture does not teach from an early age clear, honest, real communication and connection. We don’t learn how… or we don’t understand the full concept of really listening to each other, asking questions, having dialogue with someone, and what it looks like to connect. Because maybe, our parents/families didn’t know how to provide or model that (for whatever reason). Instead, all too often, we learn how to hide and put on our facades, we put guards up, and talk at or over each other.
So, we put expectations on each other… people must prove themselves to us. We put our boundaries up, we put people in boxes, we place judgment… and, we don’t trust.
We’re pretty jaded.
So, how do we break through this?