Analysis Paralysis…

I’ve hit another brick wall.

On one hand, I want to tell you all about what kinds of services will be held at the resource center. But, on the other I’m realizing there is a ton going on “behind the scenes” that I need to give attention to right now…

The cell phone has been on the fritz, the computer crashed, the car is on it’s last leg. Yes… all three at one time. The water stopped… for no reason. I swear I paid that bill. During the month of December, my unemployment insurance was sitting on shaky ground.

That darn life stuff! It always has a way of sneaking in… sometimes at the most un-welcomed times. After all, there are some things I could do without dealing with.

So, how do you get to what you want? While, navigating the curve balls life throws at you. I read a great quote recently… which inspired me to push forward.

“Some men have thousands of reasons why they cannot do what they want to, when all they need is one reason why they can.” — Willis R. Whitney — Underneath the quote the author goes on to say… “Give yourself a reason to follow and fulfill your dream. All it takes is one.”

So true.

What if you’ve got the reason… it’s just trying to figure out how to get there, that’s causing you to get stuck?

That’s where I’ve been. Behind the scenes, I’ve gotten stuck. Stuck in the thinking… through all the different directions I could go in: get my Master’s degree in Social Work, get a certificate in Event Planning, informational interviews, work in event management with non-profits or restaurants, identify organizations/people to work with, identify ways to gain experience, new people to network with… I get overwhelmed just thinking about what I could do.

Analysis Paralysis

You get really good at thinking through all the ways you can get it done. But, you get paralyzed in the doing.

I imagine myself like Spider Man… having the ability to shoot fast a web (from each wrist) that will stick to any building I aim at. But… there are so many options. So many buildings. Which one is the right one… which one is a safe one to land on? So… I sit on the rooftop overlooking the city pondering. What do I do? Which way do I go? Which building do I jump to.

So, what I’ve figured out is… the more I stare at what’s ahead of me. The more daunting it becomes… the more overwhelmed I feel… and the less that actually gets done. I worry about all the possibilities… the directions to take… and the deadlines that go with it.

The longer I look over the city and ponder which direction to take… the more comfortable I get on the rooftop I’m currently sitting on. Even though, I don’t like where I am. Sound familiar?

Analysis Paralysis.

Want to know what I’ve learned?

You can’t do it all… and you can’t do it ALL right now. It’s OK to let somethings go. Do one thing at time. Commit to doing one task a day. It will feel like in the beginning… that you aren’t getting much done. But, over the course of a week or a month… you’ll have gotten a lot done. It will FEEL good! And… it may open up doors to new opportunities, you didn’t expect.

So, I’ve put my focus on working on one big task a day (which includes a variety of projects — from sending out resumes to calculating mileage). And… I’m giving myself some grace as well. It is true that sending a non-perfect resume is better than no resume at all.

I’m tackling my big stuff first. Getting a new cell phone carrier (less money to spend each month). Filling out FAFSA applications. Calculating mileage for taxes. Networking with key people. Responding to emails. Finding courage and the motivation to walk through fears — to ask for what I want. More importantly, contacting key people and introducing out-of-the-box ideas — that can help me get closer to what I want to do.

And, I’ve made a pact with myself, if I can send one resume, ask for something that helps me get closer to what I want to do, or complete one big project each day… then, with my time afterwards… I can focus on brainstorming the vision. I can write more on what that looks like. I can work on a projected budget. I can identify people and organizations to collaborate with.

Join me… in getting unstuck!

Revealing Community – On the Coat Tails of Worry

cough

This last week has been filled with worry. If you read my last post, you know I’ve been a little concerned about health coverage. Last week, I came down with some sort of respiratory thing that seems to have gotten everyone down from New Jersey to Texas. What it is… I don’t know. It seems to be a mix of different things. Sinuses, chest cold, sore throat… Jeff thinks possibly a strain of the Swine Flu.women_in_kidney_stones_pain

My cough seems to be getting better, but with more gunk coming up. I haven’t slept much. What’s made me the most concerned lately is pain flanking my kidneys and the symptoms that have been keeping me up most nights recently.  As you could imagine, worry, worry… worry. Note: I have an appointment with a Urologist tomorrow morning.

P1050273If that isn’t enough, today has been a bah humbug sort of day. The sink backed up due to a leak in our garbage disposal. It’s been that way for a week. There are dishes piled up everywhere, the trash smells… and when I open the refrigerator door… all the food crammed on my shelves (my room-mate’s shelves are well organized) falls out. Hrumph! To top it all off my toilet has backed up. I pray it doesn’t over-flow… it looks disgusting! I think it’s time to call somebody!!

Sound familiar? What do you do… and, who do you call? Something tells me the Ghostbusters aren’t gonna help in this scenario.

Well, it’s Laura to the rescue at New Creations. What a good group session today! On the coat tails of worry and stinky (literally) days. I went to my networking group. And, wouldn’t you know it… guess what we talked about!  Building your personal community (people you call onrotary-cell-phone) and where you feel like you have gaps (when you feel you don’t have anyone to support you in specific areas).

debriefer maytag repairman richmondWe talked about the difference between personal and professional networking groups… and the importance of both. Today was mainly about how to build and maintain your personal network. Identify who they are. Are you connected in the important areas of finding support for work challenges, household dilemas (the water closet backing up), healthcare (doctors, dentists, chiropractors), do you have people to call on when your having a crappy day, when there are things that are out of your control (life coaches, counselors, mentors), when the bills are piling up and you have no idea how to pay them (financial advisors)…and the list goes on.

Also included was how you feel asking for help (getting in tune with your emotions) and how it feels to have people to call on to help you out with all the stuff building up in your life.6a00e54ef6fd3b883400e551c5adcd8834-800wi

The question for peer support today… where are the gaps in your personal network?

After a week of worrying about health concerns, financial woes, wondering when I would have time to study my GRE book, and dealing with the sink backing up… I could answer that question.

In my next post, I’ll share with you the exercise we did – identifying our personal network (We made a visual illustration. I thought that helped put it in a bigger perspective.) And, maybe share with you some of my gaps… as well as some of the insights I picked up.

Staying Healthy

Sore throat, body aches, fever...

Sore throat, body aches, fever...

There is something going around right now… and it starts with a sore throat… grows into a runny nose, chest congestion, body aches, and fever.

I often wonder how I might go to the doctor when I don’t have insurance coverage. It’s a worry that stays constant. Especially when the sore throat I have turns into a fever (it hasn’t). I worry about medical bills I’ve accumulated and how I will pay them off. Where will the money come from? What will I do if I need to go to the doctor just to get antibiotics or medicine? What will I do if something bigger, something more substantial happens? How will I pay for it? And, more than that, will they give me care?

How will I receive care?

How will I receive care?

Sure, we’ve “received” word that Cobra insurance has been extended. But, who can actually afford paying for Cobra on unemployment funds… or private insurance? What if you’re not getting unemployment payments… how do you manage? Premiums are going up. And, as time goes forward… the little man (you and me), we’re getting caught in the fray.

It’s easy to not get stressed about it, when you are feeling good. But, when you start to feel bad… you must find a way to take care of it on your own and hope that it goes away. Or, face the reality and worry that come with trying to figure out a way to be able to pay for the doctor visit, tests, or medicine that is needed.

Wash your hands, drink your fluids, get plenty of sleep...

Wash your hands, drink fluids, get plenty of sleep...

If you are unemployed for any reason, now… more than ever get plenty of sleep, drink fluids, wash your hands, exercise, eat right, find those things that help manage your stress, stay current with your support network.

Staying healthy...

Feeling good...

Potential health issues are all around us… everything ranging from recreational injuries (biking, hiking, rollerblading) to the ordinary flu bugs. Now is the time to be vigilent at staying healthy. With health insurance premiums on the rise and money being scarce, it doesn’t pay to get sick right now or fall off a horse and break something.

Vacation is Good For the Soul

Losing track of time in a field full of flowers.

Losing track of time in a field full of flowers.

Jeff (my boyfriend) and I spent a week in Ruidoso, NM unwinding and decompressing. It was great to get away! It was even better to forget what day it was and what month we were in.

Getting lost in the mountains.

Getting lost in the mountains.

If you have been stressing over a job loss or change in careers, try to make it a point to take small get-a-ways. The ones where you can go… spend the least amount of money (unless you’ve got a savings account and can pull from it for a cruise or coast to coast road-trip), and decompress mentally and emotionally. Just let yourself “be” in the moment. Forget what day it is, what time it is, what you are supposed to do, and enjoy yourself.

Who ever says you should ALWAYS be focusing on this job search thing… may not relate to how tough it is. Take a break from time to time. Trust me, it’ll make a difference when you get back… and you’ll have new focus and hopefully more motivation to get those things you’ve been putting off… done.

Getting Started… Step #2

Step #2… Support Network.

I am still sometimes amazed to learn that some people going into this type of change in their life, don’t have a support network. Things are crazy enough, don’t go it alone! Without support, I don’t know where I would be.

6a00d83451b4dd69e2010537154a31970b-800wiOur support networks give us, well you guessed it… support. They also offer encouragement, they challenge us — as iron sharpens iron, they motivate us, they cheer for us. They keep us accountable.  And, they tell us when what we’re doing isn’t really working.

Support Networks… like onions, come in layers.

Closest to you are the people who will keep you on course and accountable — a handful of key people. Maybe that looks like close friends, family members, or a spouse. Sometimes they are not our favorite people, because accountability isn’t always a walk in the park.  But, we realize how good they are for us.2885783824_ec87f1d791

Then we peel our secondary and tertiary layers. Friends, extended family, work contacts, and networking support groups.

Another part to having a support network, is keeping them informed. I sometimes have to remind myself to do just that.  You’d be surprised at how they can connect you to what you need and how many people really want to know!